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OPINION

My two-year-old and I were getting ready to go to the store. Edit: I was getting us ready to go to the store, furiously running around the house packing up toys and extra clothes and snacks and water bottles, stuffing it all into the Almighty Diaper Bag.

Suddenly, in a tornado of cheerios and Hot Wheels, I realized: I no longer needed the diaper bag nor did I require the vast majority of its contents.

I didn’t need:

• a gazillion diapers
• a full pack of wet wipes
• a change pad
• 3 burp cloths
• Diaper cream
• Hand sanitizer
• Sanitizing wipes
• Teething rings
• 3 bibs
• 2 onesies
• Extra pair of pants, shirt, sweater (for baby)
• Extra pair of pants, shirt, sweater (for me)
• 2 toques (or sunhats)
• 3 pairs of socks
• Extra pair of shoes
• Blanket to sit on
• Blanket to wrap baby in
• 2 books
• Several toys
• A stuffed animal
• One pair of mittens
• Snacks
• Baby-wearing carrier
• Plastic bag for wet/ soiled clothing

Instead, I stuffed one diaper, a sandwich bag with some wet wipes in it, and a snack into my purse, took my son’s hand in mine, and walked out our front door. It felt like freedom.

It may not seem like much — after all, it’s just a bag — but believe me, it was liberating.

It was more than the bag. It was everything the bag represented. Inside that bag were all the nuisances of early parenting: the extra onesies to replace the ones covered in spit up, the change pads to keep my pristine newborn off the floor, the muslin cloths to keep the sun off him, and the numerous blankets and layers to keep him the perfect temperature. Wrapped up in that diaper bag was all the worry and the paranoia of forgetting something crucial to the health and happiness of my baby. The bag, and everything in it, can weigh a new parent down physically and mentally.

Which is why ditching it feels so good. It means you’re out of the woods. You’ve made it.

Life feels a little lighter. You can zip out to the store without having to plan the trip around nap times. You don’t need a baby carrier or stroller anymore because the kid CAN WALK BY THEMSELF.

They can eat what you eat, so you can share the same snack. You are so good at diaper changes by now, you can do them one-handed in the backseat of your car. Heck, maybe your kid will even poop in a public toilet.

Instead of packing a carefully curated collection of on-the-go toys, you can simply point out items of interest on your outings or give them a bunch of bananas to rip produce stickers off of. The world is your toy box.

You don’t need to bring a thousand layers for them, because chances are they are too busy running around to get cold.

I definitely needed my diaper bag for a while. There was a security in knowing I had all the essentials with me. It made it possible to leave the house and helped me feel prepared out in the world with my little one. But I don’t need it anymore. I’m okay with a little unpredictability and problem-solving. It’s more of an adventure that way.

— Charlotte Helston gave birth to her first child, a rambunctious little boy, in the spring of 2021. Yo Mama is her weekly reflection on the wild, exhilarating, beautiful, messy, awe-inspiring journey of parenthood.

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