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Kamloops News

POULSEN: Polls smolls. The winner is...

Image Credit: Chuck Poulsen
October 15, 2015 - 8:09 AM

The election polling business is in shambles.

Not just because of cell phones - although that's part of it - but because of caller ID and an unwillingness of people to answer unknown callers.

There are programs to reach cell numbers but even if someone answers, the pollster can't pin it to a riding. The number of seats matter, not general voting percentages.

(The latest theory is that Justin will win the popular vote but end up with fewer seats than Harper).

The famous Gallup company has just announced in the U.S. it isn't planning any polls for the presidential primaries. And Gallup won't commit to tracking the general election next year. They can't guarantee the credibility of their polls in the electronic age.

It's all more complicated than just that - and I'll spare both of us the details - but the outcome of this election will be more of a guessing game than ever before.

You'd have to be a real idiot to think you can make an informed prediction.

Here's my prediction: Liberals win by 15 seats.

Never underestimate the power of the Big Mo in the fourth quarter.

Of course, I could be wrong. That's why my sports bookie sends me a Christmas card in thanks every year.

*

None of our leaders are funny.

Certainly not like Obama, if you saw his standup at the last media dinner. Hillary Clinton on SNL was mildly amusing.
We don't know if Harper can be funny because he never tries. Mulcair had his comical moments in the Question Period, but he gave up fun for the election campaign. No Tommy Douglas, is Mulcair.

The glib Justin has potential but tries too hard at a joke, and that kills it. A little more deadpan, Justin.

Is it too much to expect some entertainment value from these people?

My story idea on this didn't work out but I'll report it because of an interesting tidbit at the end of this item.

I asked three Canadian comedians to rate the candidates on their comedic talents.

I know Ron James got my message, but he didn't reply. I was not amused.

Local comedian David Kopp did reply but said the doesn't pay any attention to politics.

The message from Martin Short's agent was that Short wanted $10,000 to give me a phone call.

If I had asked Infonews managing editor Marshall Jones for the money, that would have been a laugh.

*

Here's a funny story about a niqab - and don't we need one - from a Muslim woman:

"I remember a true story my mom told me years ago about one of her neighbours in Egypt. A man was so protective of his young daughter that he was extremely restrictive and would not allow her to go out, even to study with other girls in their family homes.

"One day she introduced him to her new friend, a nice quiet girl who wore the niqab and convinced her father to let the friend come to their home to study.

"The father said OK and their friendship continued for a while. Then the father heard suspicious sounds coming from a room in the house and he was surprised to discover that the friend was actually a man in disguise!

"It turned out the two were in a sexual relationship. Of course it was a huge scandal and he forced the man to marry his daughter, but I don't know how the story ended after that."

— Chuck Poulsen can be reached at poulsenc30@hotmail.com.

News from © iNFOnews, 2015
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