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OPINION

Looking for a house to make a home is proving to be a difficult challenge.

Not only am I carrying school-girl visions of white picket fences and, backyards bordering on lush, green forests with a ‘happy’ community of neighbours making pot roast together and playing Bocce every night, but I have a list of wants (not needs), and the dream of a perfect existence.

In reality, it will be a short list when it comes down to it, as my children will be the determining factors on any kind of move.

They are more and more of my type — the cart before the horse type.

The people who had children first, and then started thinking about putting down some roots.

And despite all the warnings about doing things in order to really be successful, we are just a tad shy of the status quo.

So here I am, a little closer to home ownership, but definitely learning what drives my laundry list of wants and needs – my kids.

Who knew that not only would they control how long I get to shower and which snacks I have to share, but they also control where I am going to live.

Clearly my toddlers don’t have the funds to purchase their own homes just yet, but they are the bosses as far as I am concerned — maybe my daughter a little more so than my son.

Whenever I am even thinking about what I am looking for in a future home, the questions immediately start peppering my brain – Is there a big enough backyard to play in? Are there lots of children in the neighbourhood for my kids to play with? Is there a store they can walk to when they get older? Will they want to live here when they are 5, 15, and 25 (yes, I am keeping them forever).

It’s no longer about precise landscaping and decorative do-dads – they will just get destroyed anyway.

I like the idea of an open concept with fewer places for littles ones to run and hide. Why is it always a favourite game and why do they tell you where they are going to hide?!

I want to ensure there is a good school close by and there is the option of walking to and from when my kiddos are ready.

Proximity to a good school is perhaps the most important driving factor, but then again who decides which school is the best, or what the best even means?

Nevertheless, I’m not just investing in a piece of property anymore, I’m investing in my children’s futures.

It isn’t just about me anymore.

And it can be amazingly stressful to take yourself out of the equation, try to make a decision and hope you are doing what is best.

And then I wonder, who else has made a final decision to move to home, based solely on where you wanted your children to grow up, and did it all work out?

— Becky is a 30-something, red haired, mother of two, trying to navigate this life as best she can. She enjoys talking to people and discovering their stories. Still trying to balance her personal and professional life, she juggles work and play. In her spare time Becky can be found visiting with friends, spending time with her famiy and saving time by reading while walking.

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