Shelby Cinda

Image Credit: SUBMITTED/Shelby Cinda

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When Shelby Cinda first turned to sex work, it wasn’t by choice.

After a life-altering event at the age of 19, Cinda needed money. Of course, she had other options, but rebelling against her strictly religious family and exploring repressed sexuality was also enticing.

"I just started on MyFreeCams with this persona, I didn’t use my name or anything like that, but, to be honest, I didn’t think of the implications or anything like that, I just did it,” she says.

"Growing up, I was very very religious. My whole family was a big Mennonite family so sexual liberation was not a thing. I’ve always been the black sheep of my family and it’s almost like it was 'this is the direction I need to take.' I didn’t fully understand it, but it became so liberating for me,” Cinda says. “Back then I was very naive about it, but it was good, I didn’t have any bad experiences, it was really awesome, it liberated me and, somehow, I managed to keep it from my family.”

Also known as Cinda Citron, she recalls being slightly naive about the potential consequences of the work she was getting into.

Luckily, her experience was positive and when her family came back into her life she thought she would put it behind her.

“If I could do it over, I wouldn’t be like “okay 110% let’s go.” Onlyfans was not a thing back then. Today I know that whatever I put out there is going to be out there forever, but that wasn’t something I was really conscious about when I first started and I didn’t have people to talk to or ask about it and to this day I can Google the name I used to go by and find screenshots of myself and if I hadn’t chosen to continue on this route later in life, it would have really fucked with my life,” Cinda says. “After about a year, I stopped because of partners I was with and getting back into good places with my family so it wasn’t a necessity anymore, and I kind of retired at that point and assumed it would be the end of that.”

Roughly 15 years later, a mix of circumstances and an appealing opportunity led her to get back into it.

“Because I struggle with mental health, it’s really hard for me to maintain a job all the time and be committed in that way, and that’s when OnlyFans was starting so my partner, who knew about my past, was like ‘you should do this, you can make some money and be your own boss.' And so I got into it again,” she says. “When I was starting back up, a friend told me about this company that sends you a bunch of free panties, and you film yourself as you try them on and review them. I was like 'free panties!' So I got into it and within a year received more than 100 pairs of panties and from there gained traction with other companies that wanted me to try on other clothing which led to me getting into selling my undies and into OnlyFans; I’ve been pretty successful.”

Shelby Cinda

Image Credit: SUBMITTED/Shelby Cinda

While sex work is often stigmatized, it is consumed by people of all demographics.

“I do live streaming. I’m currently working to get to my free cams, I do a lot of custom content, I also do a lot of try-on hauls which people like a lot. I sell panties, I do girlfriend experiences, and I have a few friends that I like to make content with. When it comes to clients, I’ve had men as young as 21 messaging me but also men in their sixties, I’ve had women as well and even couples, it’s all over really, it’s anybody that gets excited by sex.”

Cinda does this through OnlyFans, an online platform used by many adult content creators. On this platform, she has a profile to which people can subscribe to for an amount of money and, from there, she runs her business.

OnlyFans has its ups and downs. Notably, in 2021 it announced it was going to remove all the sex workers from its platform after receiving criticism about the presence of child pornography. After pushback, OnlyFans remained available for sex workers.

“I think it left a lot of uneasiness and sure, I feel a bit apprehensive because if they do decide to do that, I’ll lose all my followers and subscribers. I do also think that they take a huge percentage, which sucks. OnlyFans takes about 20% of your earnings which ends up being a lot; in sex work, talent managers only take between ten to 15% so I hate that this big corporation is getting 20% of my earnings. Otherwise, in my personal experience, it’s still the best platform, it has so many features to facilitate my work. They have a very strict vetting system and everyone has to have a detailed profile, with proof of identification required. It is very 'by the book' which I appreciate because it makes me feel safer about the people on there.”

But choosing a platform provider isn’t he only difficult aspect of online sex work she has to navigate — the permanence of the Internet, judgement and scammers.

“The biggest thing is that all my work will be on the Internet forever, as long as the Internet is alive and running. I am up there so I do know that if I ever choose to have kids it will probably come and bite me in the ass, but I’ll cross that bridge when I get there. A big negative consequence is that, at first, there was definitely familial judgement and that was a huge thing for me. I also got scammed a lot in the beginning which is something you learn to avoid as you go on, like you always have to get the payment first.”

Sex work also puts the her in a vulnerable position which can take an emotional toll.

“There’s this percentage of men who are entitled assholes who can get a bit frustrating. But really the one thing I don’t love about it is that you always have to be on, and everybody expects that I just sit at home in front of my computer and wait around for them,” Cinda says. “Being a very emotional person can be hard in this line of work because you do get some negativity so it can be hard to navigate through that.”

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An aspect of sex work that is also often misunderstood is that it is actual work. While many people view sex work as a side hustle that will provide fast and easy money. That’s not the case, she says.

“I would love for it to be more commonly known that OnlyFans is not an easy, quick way to make money and that is the number one conversation I have with people who approach me trying to find out how to get into it. I’ll always tell them that it remains a dog-eat-dog industry and I’m very honest: it is hard work, it is a full-time job and you have to think of it as a customer service job. You have to always be on, always have that bubbly personality, and whatever you’re selling always has to be on point which can get to be a lot. It’s also not quick, it takes a lot of advertising yourself to start raking in bigger chunks of money,” Cinda says. “People don’t always understand what goes into it. You are constantly selling yourself and I don’t think people realize how tough that is. You also have to spend money to make money — people expect proper lighting, good costumes, you to look presentable, the area you’re filming in has to look nice. The reality is I have to set aside full days for OnlyFans: I have to respond to messages, plan what content I’m going to be creating, do my hair, my makeup, my costumes, make the content, then edit it, I do the customer service, the advertising, all of it. You don’t have a full team behind you, you are the whole team and at the end of the day you’re tired, just like any other job.”

Shelby Cinda

Image Credit: SUBMITTED/Shelby Cinda

While Cinda faces these challenges, she has found enough upsides to online sex work to keep her going. Online work, as opposed to in-person, guarantees a safety aspect that is extremely important to sex workers. Early on, she tried in-person work and it wasn’t for her.

“Back then the only website to get into in-person sex work was Seeking Arrangements, and there were some shifty people on there, especially back then. And almost 75% of men wanted to go somewhere like Mexico, and I didn’t like that, it was weird and didn’t feel comfortable doing that,” she says. “What’s great about online sex work is that you’re able to keep that air of protection around you and that boundary which is so important and, in-person, those boundaries are often not respected which leads to bad things happening. That boundary is always being pushed, but if someone is making me uncomfortable online, I can just block them and never talk to them again and it makes it that much easier and safer.”

But ultimately it’s the sexual freedom and inclusion that speaks to Cinda.

“I’ve never felt myself or known myself more, it really helped me figure out my own sexuality which was obviously not talked about religion-wise growing up,” she says. “When I say it’s freeing sexually, I mean that in doing this work, and researching what other workers are doing, I found out about many things I would never have otherwise. I discovered new kinks and found out what intrigues me and it allows me to fully live out my sexuality. But also, since I was little I knew that I was probably gay, and this work really solidified that I like everybody, and it’s really freeing to find this out at a young age when you still have time to explore it as opposed to a lot of women who find out once they’re already married. Moreso though, it allowed me to not feel guilty about who I am; being a kid, I remember seeing this one woman on American Idol thinking ‘oh my god, she’s so gorgeous' and immediately thinking ‘oh no, I’m going to hell.' It’s so liberating to free myself from that and not feel guilty about this and I’ve been able to feel this because of my work.”

On top of all this, online work, although time-consuming and hard, does pay off.

“I’m self-employed, so I can write off everything which saves me a lot,” Cinda says. “Last year, from my sex work, I made (a decent amount of money), and I was not working very hard, usually I can make (a lot in) a year on top of what I make as a safety officer and running social media pages.”

“Another great thing about content work is that all the content I make, I can reuse and send it to different people a hundred times over, whereas in-person it’s obviously just one time, so that saves me some time, money and energy.”

Doing sex work online has allowed Cinda to build a vast network. In person, it would be much harder to do so.

“With online work, you’re able to network with so many people and reach many more people and I’m able to meet many creators from the region, and there’s a huge amount of people in the Okanagan online. I’ve met many cool people, and made friendships which is really nice and not always a possibility with in-person work.”

While Cinda’s sex work origin story comes from trying to liberate herself from her family and her conservative upbringing, today she is on good terms with them, and she finds that her social life is not affected by her work.

“Even though I grew up very very religious, my parents are very accepting of what I do, so it hasn’t really affected my life in that way, although I have lost a few friends over the years. To be honest, I haven’t really had my work affect my personal life and it hasn’t bled into anything else really, which I’m grateful for because it’s not always the norm.”

That leaves her with no regrets.

“I love it, it’s really awesome, and it’s a lot different now than when I was 19: I feel like I’m more mature, I definitely see naivete in some decisions I made when I was younger. Now, I do it with my full name, I have no shame, this is me, and I am proud about it.”

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